Dear mouse in my house,
I just wanted to let you know that, while I’m extremely flattered you’ve decided to take up residency in my house, I think we need to discuss these living arrangements. First of all, you moved in without even telling me and my roommates. I understand you thought we would be mad, and not let you move in- if you had told us in advance, and this is true. I guess, however, you officially have squatter’s rights now.
I know the economy has been hard on us all and having roommates is a great way to save money- but we need to come to an understanding. If you are going to be staying with us, a few things need to change.
First of all- you need to pay us some rent, or at least something for utilities. It not fair to the other roommates. Secondly, you need to not be eating everyone’s food. We clearly label our food by our initials- please do not confuse M for mouse, instead of Michelle. You can just leave a paw print- better yet, keep your food outside.
In addition, the floor is not a restroom, please clean up after yourself, we are trying to get ready to move, and we can’t have droppings everywhere.
Lastly, I know you’ve been lonely lately, but please knock before entering- we are very stressed lately, and surprise entrances are not always welcome.
I hope that we can come to mutual understanding about this, and this does not damage our friendship.
Cordially,
Mimi
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